Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Hansel & Gretel thoughts

Since this isn't like the normal films I go see in the theater, going to be short on movie info and long on trailer info. Seemed like there were more trailers than usual, but maybe it's because they were all new-ish to me and not the normal kiddy fare I usually see over and over.

First up we had a trailer for the new Die Hard movie, 'A Good Day to Die Hard'
Not sure how to feel about this one yet, more about it if I end up watching it.

Next we had 'Safe Haven'
I had mixed emotions for this one. Starts out sounding like your normal Nicholas Sparks fare, but then twists into something different. I'm not into his novels or the movies based on them, but this one actually looks interesting.

Then came 'Olympus has Fallen'
First off, I'd like to remind you all I'm a bit of a weirdo. This starts, and immediately I'm thinking *Holy cow, the president's wife dies and she comes back to haunt him and the agent who let her die, this is going to be an amazing horror movie yay!* But then it turns into the basic plot of ex-special forces agent has to save the president from the bad guys, blah blah, only the scene has changed from new york/air force one, to the White House. First half intriguing, second half straight out of a Kurt Russell movie. Next.

Now we have 'The Call'
The trailer speaks for itself here, but how many random guys does our serial killer have to murder before someone realizes his direction and position?

This trailer I see all over at the mall, 'Beautiful Creatures'
This one looks interesting, seems like it was made for teens, but Jeremy Irons is in it, so it's worth a watch for me.

Another trailer for 'Star Trek: Into Darkness'
I'm not that much into Star Trek, and Tayron doesn't know how he feels about this movie yet, so it's up in the air if we see this one or not.

Saving the best for last, the trailer for 'Jurassic Park 3D'
Hate all you want, but I love this movie and look forward to seeing it in theaters again, in 3D or not.

Now we get to the feature presentation, 'Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters.' I'm finding it hard to talk about this movie without spoiling anything, or giving some of my favorite dialogue due to all the cursing. Remember, trying to keep this blog young person friendly. We'll start at the beginning.
The intro is pretty standard fairytale lore, setting up the backstory in universe, mother tells father to ditch the kids in the forest, he reluctantly does so, kids find cottage-
Stopping there a moment. I really enjoyed the cottage design, looking creepy and mystical, but still made out of candy, door covered in candy runes and symbols. It was gorgeous.

So the kids kill the witch, who looked fantastically ugly to me until I saw the countless witches near the end, and they move on. Cue the opening credits. This bit was also great, animated woodcarving image montage of the kids killing many witches and growing up into the adults they'll be for the rest of the movie. After the montage is done, I just want to mention this part, the next scene that comes up is a crowded marketplace where there is a man selling bottles of milk that have pictures of children tied to them. Hansel and Gretel go on a hunt after humiliating the sheriff. They seem to get their butts kicked as much as they kick butt.
....And I find I can't say anymore about the movie. I have pages of notes, but don't want to spoil anything, or even give away some of the best bits in the beginning. For instance, the entire tavern scene I found absolutely hilarious. The action scenes were well done I thought, the dialogue, while not witty, was still amazing. It seemed like people knew this was going to be a bad movie going in, and just went all out and turned it from something blah, into something amazing.
One last thing I want to mention is the use of practical effects. There isn't much cgi in the movie, what is in it is used to enhance what is already there and going on, like some of the witches spells and magic. Other things, for instance, there is a troll assisting the witches in capturing the children, and he's an animatronic creature.
So I went into this movie not expecting much other than gratuitous action scenes, and came out loving it and cannot wait until it comes out on dvd.

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